Here is a summary of how things have been going:
Weight - Still haven't lost any more than the original 3-4 pounds from January, but also haven't gained any back.
Bags - Completely assimilated to carrying only reusable bags. We are almost through our drawer full of plastic bags too. It feels great. Paul makes fun of the really pretentious bag I bought that says something like, "Paper or Plastic? Neither!" I just think the design is cute. I'm not a smug asshole about it, I haven't even moved to Prius-level neo-hippieism yet.
Being a Good Partner - I think I'm doing amazing. I haven't had a psych-ward-worthy meltdown in months. I'm calm. I'm sweet. I'm patient....well, more patient. And it's not just because life is getting easier either, because there have been some serious effing curve balls thrown at us this month.
Creating Every Day - Obviously, taking on a full load at school means that some days every thing I create is also for a course; however! there are many days that I create for me, for fun, for love, etc... January was a lot of sketching and colored pencils, I've found that February projects have been a little bigger, more water color and hot glue. Surprisingly not too much glitter (yet).
Setting Aside Time/Money for Me - Not that there's been an abundance of free time, but I have made some and put aside resources for things that made my life more fun or easier. Did a limo night in West Hollywood, a weekend in Big Bear, took Alex up to LA/Hollywood to play around just because, bought myself a new laptop that is making studying/lectures/schlepping electronics around SO much easier, been on a few much needed dates with the man .... like I said, not too crazy, but it feels good to go do things I enjoy and be around people I love.
Getting Pregnant - I guess considering how busy I am I shouldn't be too discouraged with setbacks in this area (seriously, when am I going to have a baby? If I got pregnant NOW I'd be due some time around Thanksgiving and would be out for Fall semester and nursing a baby all of Spring semester (I am picturing myself literally breastfeeding an infant during a lecture right now)...how would that work? I don't know), but I still convince myself that I can do and have it all and any bump on this road is unacceptable. Back in January I thought I was having pregnancy symptoms and feeling weird in general and it turns out I was having symptoms, but not because I was actually knocked up. I've had ovarian cysts probably my whole post-puberty life. They're not that big of a deal unless one ruptures and then you want to die for a day or so, but even when that's over you're fine. The ones I'm used to are called "simple cysts". Apparently, in the past few months I've also developed a "complex cyst" which is not as easy to ignore. This bad boy is about an inch in diameter, inside my left ovary, is vascular and also bleeding into my abdominal cavity causing almost constant discomfort and being a real bitch. The nature and location of this SOB are also mimicking pregnancy symptoms (lucky me!). I have a family history of ovarian cancer so it was frightening to learn I had an even greater chance now (1 in 5) of having a cancerous growth. The doctors are taking a "wait and see" approach and want to reassess size/pain in 4 weeks, which I find annoying. Basically, they offer me BC pills to possibly shrink the cyst (though sometimes it can make it worse) or they offer a hardcore prescription pain pill to take whenever I'm in pain. Which is almost every day. I'm not at all into the idea of taking a narcotic every day, I have shit to take care of, I can't just be doped up indefinitely. Plus, this stupid thing could actually be stopping me from becoming pregnant, so I want it gone all the more. Although there's nothing I can really do about a doctor not wanting to operate (take it out or I will!), I decided I wasn't going to fall for the all too often "solution" of throwing pills at a problem while I wait. I've been going to acupuncture once a week for the pain and discomfort associated with this and it seems to really be helping. My acupuncturist is convinced that with herbs and treatment she can actually make the cysts (even the scary one) shrink, but right now I don't want to put hope into anything. As long as she's relieving the pain, I'm happy, and if she actually makes them go away - that's awesome too.
Not that it's impossible to still get pregnant right now, but based on all the new bullshit, I'm just focusing on getting over this hump first. Good times....
Getting a 3.5+ - Right now (6 weeks into school) I have all As. Which isn't hard. I actually have a 145% in one class because of extra credit. Now to see if I can keep them at As for 3 more months...
I guess that's all the important updates. I really will try to be better about updating and not wait another 5-6 weeks.
xoxo
Abby, props to you for staying mostly positive (so it seems from your FB posts) throughout all of this stuff you are going through. I will definitely keep you guys in my prayers! And I will let you know sometime during the fall semester how much fun breastfeeding and being in school at the same time can be... ;) Haha, NOT looking forward to that one, but I definitely agree, it IS doable, especially for strong women like us, right?! Keep your head up and I hope that your health issues resolve soon! <3 Megs
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